Friday, July 30, 2010

Future Husband Histories

For Leah's Bachlerette Party (can you hear the CAPS? Because that's how I pronounce it), I looked into the future (the past for Maureen as she's already married), and divined who the people attending would marry. This is some of what I found:

Maureen: On the night before Maureen's wedding, a robot from the future, (let's call him Jake 2.0), came back in time from the future to take over the world. He planed to accomplish this goal by infiltrating Jake's life/job as a computer dude and destroy the world's technology, thereby making himself the most advanced weapon in the world. So he killed the real Jake and took his place. He married Maureen (she didn't notice the switch), and then something happened to Jake 2.0; he fell in love. He and Maureen now own a house and dog together and lived happily ever after.

Leah: On the eve of Leah's wedding Brian discovered something; he had a long lost twin! unfortunately for him, it was an evil twin--Bryon. Bryon couldn't stand to see his good twin so happy, so he tied Brian to some train tracks, shaved his evil-twin goatee and married Leah. She didn't notice the difference--apparently my friends are unobservant. They led a fulfilling life of crime together.

Aquila: Aquila was at the beach one day swimming when suddenly an undercurrent caught her and she began to drown! Luckily, Old Spice Guy was on that very same beach building life size sandcastles for blind orphans and kittens to live in. He saw her flailing in the water and jet skied out to her rescue. A shark was circling Aquila but Old Spice Guy punched it in the eye and it backed off. They were married the next week on the very same beach.

Katie: On her way to Ecuador to do medical mission work Katie's plane crashed into the ocean. But don't fear--Aqua Man saved her! They rode to shore on the backs of dolphins and everyone was very impressed. Katie wanted to stay in Atlantis with Aqua Man, but she had a mission, so she left and worked for 6 months in the hospitals of Ecuador. But when she was finished, she returned to the beach where she had last seen Aqua man--and he was waiting for her! They now live happily in Atlantis.

1 comment:

  1. Have I told you how much jake loves the revisionist history you created? it is on our fridge. Easily the best wedding photo we have :)